Let the Masturbation Jokes begin!!!

I forgot to mention that when I went skiing last weekend, I fell awkwardly on my wrist. I fell a total of 2 times in 2 days (HTE will say that I fell 4 times, but I discount the 2 where I wasn't actually skiing...I was just standing, and fell over) , which is a pretty good percentage as far as falling goes (~20-25 runs, 3 falls...not bad) However, on the 3rd time, I think I royally screwed up my wrist...which is a horrible percentage for wrist safety. I don't even remember the fall, but I noticed later that night that my left wrist was a little tender. It's been tender all week, but after doing some tri-pulldowns yesterday, I can't even use my left arm. I can't lift anything, open anything, close anything, twist anything; Needless to say, weights, doors, cans, and twist-off beers are my nemesis at this point. Looks like my "every 5 year doctor's visit" is coming a little earlier this decade.

My first Gillette Stadium Excursion - Treo Pics #4

This is my fourth "Treo Pics" installment. These pics are from my first trip to Gillette Stadium, for the exhibition game against the NY Giants in 05'. First Time???

You: First time to Gillette?
Your stupid friend: But Hags, aren't you a HUGE Pats fan?
The Hag: Yes....Yes, I am. But you see, a long time ago...when the Pats still played at Foxboro Stadium, I went to a 95' Pats vs. Jets game with HTE and Keith. The seating was horrible, and the view was worse. (Sidebar: As bad as the seats were, I did learn a few NFL secrets that day from a choice section of local sports fans, like "Ronnie Lott has a twat" and "Boomer takes it up the bummer"...who knew??) After the game, I declared that "I will NEVER go to another game until they build a new stadium where a man of my stature can fit comfortably". And a new stadium with said seating was constructed, and the ticket prices henceforth sky-rocketed to the moon. Consequently yes, my first time was this time, so back the F off.

It was a Thursday afternoon, and my neighbor called and asked me if I wanted to go to "the game"? He said that a friend couldn't go, and that he had a ticket for me, and asked if I wanted to go. "Uh..hold on...lemme think.....Yes, yes I do!!!!". So I put on my best Red Sox jersey, Sox hat, kissed T and M goodbye, and headed outside. My neighbor's waiting for me in his truck, he looks at me, and he goes "You know...we're going to the Pats, right?". It didn't even dawn on me that he was talking about the Pats when he said "the game"...I just assumed that he meant the Red Sox...that's how far out out my realm of vision that actually attending a Pats game had been. Anyway, I left the Sox jersey on (hey, they were still in it at this point), and I ran in to switch hats. With that done, we headed to the train station, where we picked up his nephews (13 year old twins).

Well, it was a really fun time. Many beers were drank, and that's where it gets a little "blue". A drunk guy behind me ALMOST purposely poured his beer on me (he was being a jerk all game long, and near the end of the game, he said "Watch this" to his friends, and I turned around and caught him right before he was about to do it). I don't think he realized that I was as big as I am, because when I stood up and told him I was going to break his face, he looked a little frightened. Anyway, it was the end of the game, and my neighbor said "Let's get going...". So we left, but not before I yelled down to the jerk that I'd meet him upstairs (I had no intention of fighting this loser in front of my neigher AND HIS YOUNG NEPHEWS, but I just wanted to make this guys last 15 minutes at Gillette a little "frantic"). As we left, I apologized to my neighbor, and explained to his nephews that my reaction was probably not the best way to handle the situation (lie...it was the BEST way, and the only way that I know of) and that fighting is wrong (technically, I didn't fight at all...I just threatened to fight the guy...and if he HAD poured beer on me, it wouldn't have been a fight...it would have been a mauling).

I digress. It was a fun time, except for the end, which I felt really bad about, even though I don't think it was my fault (if I didn't say anything, and he poured his beer on me, and I still didn't do anything...I'd be running this scenario in my head for years to come). Why do stupid a-holes always start with me? I really don't like fighting, and consider myself too intelligent and too old to resort to it...but it's in my nature to never back down. I guess that's something I'll need to work on, huh? Anyway, enjoy the pics!

The Hags' Workout

I've documented almost every home gym workout since the end of last year. I did a lot of other stuff that was never recorded, including basketball, running, dog walking, etc. However, because I don't carry a notebook everywhere I go, I focused on recording my workouts at home. Last year, Jan-Dec, I worked out 55 times. That works out to ~1 workout per week!!! That is absolutely pathetic, right??!? Looking back, it seems like I worked out SO much more than that, but I can't argue...it's right in front of my face. What's great about doing this is that I date each workout, and I can see where I fell off the table. Consequently, each dropoff and restart corresponds to something screwing up my schedule (good or bad)....trip to Vegas, trip to Chicago, starting a new job, quitting a new job, etc. I would HIGHLY recommend to everyone to document your workouts. It's pretty telling. You might THINK you're going to the gym a lot, but over the course of the year, it's pretty telling. I'm resolving as of right now to workout at least twice a week, upperbody and lowerbody...NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS TO MY CALENDAR!!! I can do that, right? No problem.

Here are my latest upper and lower workouts as of this week. I'm not trying to get big or anything (obvious from the weight used and the # of reps), I just want to stay in shape. I do full upper and lower body workouts on Tuesday and Thursdays (i.e. complete upper on Tues, complete lower on Thurs). I try to take only 1-2 minutes between sets. Comments?

Upper:
Flat Bench - 205x5, 185x9, 165x9, 155x8

Chest Flys - 70x12, 70x12

Shoulder Side Raises - 10x12, 10x12, 10x12

Shrugs - 155x12, 155x12, 135x14, 135x14

Pull Downs - 70x12, 70x12, 70x12

Rows - 70x12, 70x12

Tri-Cable pull downs - 40x12, 40x12, 40x12

Dips - 14, 14

Bi-Curls - 30x12, 30x12, 30x12

Lower:
Squats - 95x12, 95x12, 95x12, 95x12 (I'll try to do more weight here, but my knees are weak)

Lunges - 12, 12, 12, 12

Quad Raises - 45x12, 45x12, 45x12, 45x12

Hammy curls - 45x12, 55x12, 65x12, 75x12

Calf Raises - 135x12, 135x12, 135x12, 135x12

Situps - 12, 12, 12

As I look at this, I realize I should probably alter my weight more, as I'm sure my body is adjusting to these weights. Anyway...this is a good exercise to go through...I'm purposely being more critical of my workouts so I can improve, right?!

Guy wins fake lottery...

This poor guy. I would cry my eyes out, and then open up a can of serious whoopass if this happened to me.

Skiing again....and I love it.

I'm back after a brief holiday hiatus, which included a 3 day skiing forray in Vermont (Stratton, to be exact). I haven't skied in ~5 years, but I was happily surprised to discover that I haven't lost "da skilz". Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not exactly an "expert"...I've skied the occasional triple diamond trail and a few "out of bounds" trails in Colorado, but this was done in a very "non-aggressive manner" (i.e. I pizza'd quite a bit of this trails, and left the french fries at home). However, when I hit the slopes this past week, I felt great...my turns were sharp, my legs didn't burn...it was a blast! It made me wonder why I haven't skiied in so long! Anyway, while I was up there, I had a few thoughts:

1. I love my non-elliptical, circa 94', straight skiis (Fischer Spectras...yes, old and crappy, but I love them) and my crappy KoFlach boots (yes, I've never heard of them before either). They are 195's, and it appears that NO ONE skiis anything larger than 170 these days due to the shaped-ski craze. My brother's rentals were at least 8-10 inches shorter. It's actually pretty cool, cause now I have no problem finding my skiis after lunch...just head for the longest pair on the rack. And my boots have NEVER hurt my feet...why change, right?
   
2. NEVER go skiing on a weekend which coincides with school winter vacation. Holy crowded zoo, Batman! I knew it was going to be like this because the main purpose was to get away for the New Years, but criminy, was it packed!!!
3. Snowboarding...ug, I feel old. Forgive the sub-list, but here are a few casual observations:
• Is it impossible to stop without falling down? And why do they feel the need to fall down in the middle of the trail and wait for their buddies? Everytime you go down a trail, there's a pack of boaders' waiting in the middle. I ALWAYS try to stop on the side.
• The youngsters really seem to love it. It seems that anyone between 13 and 25 years of age snowboard these days.
  
• Is facial hair a requirement for snowboarding over the age of 18? Every guy snowboarder has a soul patch or a goatee or doesn't shave at all. What's the deal?
• Yes, sweet trick...that was a great "rail grind"...now try doing it on skiis, Mr. "SlipKnot is the greatest band ever!".
  
4. Skiing is really f'in expensive, huh? The gear, the clothing, the tickets...yikes! No wonder so many people consider it an elitist sport.
   

Anyway, I had a blast, and I'm really looking forward to going again.