Saturday, December 03, 2005

Treo Pics #1

I just got a new Blackberry 7105t a few weeks ago, so I'm in the process of transitioning over from my Treo 600 (which, BTW, rocks as an organizer but SUCKS as a phone...maybe the 650 is better...whatever). In any case, I downloaded all the pictures off of my phone, and I'm posting them here piecemail.

These first 2 pics are very special: my first (and last) visit to Yankee Stadium in 2004. My sister-in-law got tickets to the Red Sox (Go baby!!) vs. the Yankees (BOOO!!) at Yankee Stadium through someone she works with. We all drove down together, and stopped in at Stan's shithole bar for a few libations prior to the game. Most of the patrons were Yankee fans (duh), but there was also a respectable Sox contingent present as well.

Most of the fans at the game were respectful, as were we, but there were a few annoying bastards around us who would not leave us alone (Ey, Joey...You sees dees guys down dere clappin' for da Sox? Ey, hair...don't mess with ma' hair!). 8th inning, in comes Mariano Rivera...and here comes the fans: "Dandman...Dandman Goodnight...Here gums the Dandman...Mr. Dandman, bring us a ring". Rivera, who I truly respect, ended up giving away 2 runs, and the Sox won the game. What was great about this was 1) the silence in the park after the loss and 2) the looks on the Yankee fan's faces...priceless. Yes, I've had the same look, but most people are used to that look on a Red Sox fan's face...but a Yankee fan?...oh, man. As we all know, the faces of Yankees fans across the world looked that same way in October 04', when the Sox finally won the Series again.

Long story short: The first picture is, obviously, of Yankee Stadium. The second picture is one of my brother symbolically giving the finger to all the Yankees fans at Stan's (especially the guy right behind him).

Not for the faint of heart...

I can't live with the lies anymore. I've built this happy little life for myself, but behind the blissful facade is a dirty little secret that I've hidden for the majority of my life, and it's time I come clean. Shame is a hard thing to live with, but broken pride is much, much worse. How can I keep a part of me secret, when after all, it's what makes me who I am? It's coming out day, and it's been a long time coming. What dark, personal mystery has caused such emotional anguish, you ask? My nub toe. Yes, that's right big toe doesn't have a toenail*, and sadly, it never will. Today, I stand before you on the moutaintop, with my nub raised high, and I shout: I HAVE A REALLY FRIGGING UGLY TOE, AND I'M NOT GOING TO HIDE IT ANYMORE!!!!!

Gone are the sandal-less summers. Goodbye, steel-toes boots. Water mocassins in the locker room?...HA, NEVER AGAIN! No longer will I idly sit by as Foot Locker employees rain showers of mock down upon me. No, not I. From today forth, I am proud of my nub. My nub is my friend, my companion, my medal of honor. But fear not, faithful reader, I will only use nub's powers for good, never evil (aside from the occasional gross out joke, or scaring my children). My newfound confidence is solidified with the knowledge that I am not alone; there are legions of toe martyrs in the world longing for freedom. Join me, Brothers in Arms (or Toes)!! Together, we will conquer the prejudices that have long enslaved us!!

*I was going to explain how this happened to my toe, and it went a little sumthin' like dis...hit it!: "I am not alone in my suffering. Long ago, my grandfather was bitten by a radioactive spider, mutating his DNA, consequently bestowing upon him super-human abilities. But a much worse genetic after-effect had been wrought upon the male decendants...". Some of this is true...he was PROBABLY bitten by a spider some point in his life, and I do have other family members with the same affliction (I will not "out" them in this forum), but I used a little "poetic license" thereafter. The real reason is that I probably clipped my nail with a little too much "gusto", caused an infection, and had to have the nail surgically removed....probably...I'm not sure...but probably.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Wanna go hiking?

The National Park Service wants to create a $5.5 million dollar task force to eradicate marijuana growth in Sequoia National Park. Can anyone else think of a bigger waste of money for taxpayers? Yes, there are plenty of drugs in existence that negatively affect society (crack, meth, heroine, etc), but I truly believe that the government is fighting an uphill battle when it comes to pot. Marijuana is the "Google" of recreational drugs...everyone is using it. Most people perceive it to be as recreational as alcohol, and the demand will not be quenched.

A better solution would be to spend that $5.5 million on strengthening the borders, thus preventing AK-47 toting immigrants from planting their "Victory Gardens" in our National Parks. Or better yet, legalize pot, tax it, and give some of that money back to the taxpayers!!! If it were legal, the growers wouldn't be in the parks, and they certainly wouldn't have a use for AK-47's. Also, can you imagine the surplus of tax dollars that could be generated by businesses (B-to-C, and B-to-B) supporting this market??

It's ridiculous to think that the US government is spending money on initiatives like this when there are far many more deserving causes (curing cancer, hurricane victims, etc). Turn pot into a goverment profit center and use the resulting money to benefit US citizens, rather than bogarting the goods.

Enough of my ranting: Yabba-Zabba...You my only friend!!!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Gettin' up there

My birthday was yesterday...I just turned 31. That would mean that:

-10 years ago, I went out on a drinking binge in Hartford...ending up at the Russion Lady (I still have the shotglass)
-15 years ago, I received my drivers license

Holy crap!...It doesn't seem that long ago that I was in Junior High, stomaching the horrors of homeroom with Ms. "SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP" Aronson. So what does this make me now: An an "older young man" or a "younger old man"? I'd like to refer to myself as a "distinguished gentleman", but I don't think that would fool anyone (I've never been a gentlemen, and the only thing that's ever been distinguished in my life was the occasional joint). I still feel young, but I'm definately starting to see the signs that I'm getting older:

-I hate when people walk on my lawn
-I can pontificate on the benefits of Blue Cross over Aetna, and be passionate about the argument.
-I've discuss politics and religion more than I'd like to admit in the past few years (Thanks, Bush).
-I've gone from drinking Bud in college, to fine malted brews during/after college, only to find myself back at Bud again.
-I notice other people's clothes more than I ever did (hey, nice shirt).
-I spend a LOT of Friday nights at home these days (this is more a product of having a young child, but hey, that's a reason, too).
-I'm older than a large portion of the players in the NBA, MLB, NFL, etc.
-The "Far Side" comics have been discontinued since Jan 1, 1995 (10 YEARS!!).
-I have a lot of grey hair (thankfully, the carpets DO NOT match the drapes...yet).

There are many more reason why I feel more "more young than old", but there's too many to list. I'm a firm believer that age is just a's more about how you feel and how your pants fit. I feel pretty damn good at this point in my life, but the pants are a little snug...looks like it's treadmill time.

Monday, November 28, 2005

The Peanuts Gang

Can these people do anything without confining everyone else to a "peanut-less" prison? This kid is scarred for life because he ate a snickers prior to "macking on his boo". I'm not going to drill into this anymore...this is my last peanut allergy post, but all I can say is that if you're allergic to nuts, stay out of my way. I ate a ton of pecan pie for Thankgiving, and I'm afraid that my fumes might cause you to break out in hives.

I'll just keep updating this blog with new articles as I come across them.Link