Have you ever wanted to grab someone by their collar, and throttle them? Have you ever gotten off the phone with a co-worker, and screamed from the top of your lungs "FFFFFFUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!"??? Have you ever donned the "1000-mile stare" as you leave a business meeting, impossible to comprehend the incompetence surrounding you? I've worked at technology companies for the last 8 years; this is my life...welcome to flavor-country, friends. Over this period, I've witnessed (or been privy to) an encyclopedic volume of blunders the likes of which no man should have to endure. However, faithful reader (you would need to be faithful to read this...I've been MIA for awhile here) there are things that make all of this worth-while. No, these are not highlights that I recite for you; no, no...these are the funny low-lights that will stick with me forever. Anyone can recite sales victories; it's the warts and moles that legends make. Here's my Top 8 (I'll add 2 more if I can think of them):

8) A Co-worker installing central air-conditioning in his home, and getting reimbursed for it, because a Windows server was making his basement too hot.
7) A client describing his personal, home-based, TERABYTE of porn.
6) Using the phrase "like a red-headed stepchild" to a red-headed co-worker...before noticing said employee had a "red head"....(Ok, I admit, this one was me...I apologized immediately, and she laughed it off)
5) A co-worker consistently using the word "EX-pecially" in front of clients. Yes...all the time.
4) A drunk UK-based co-worker performing a strip tease in front of a company event.
3) A co-worker chewing tobacco during a client meeting (AND spitting in the cup)...classic internet bubble story.
2) Discovery of shared-drive nude photos of a co-worker (placed there by said co-worker for posting to various websites).
1) A VP-maintained, publically accessible porn server, and the accompanying email from concerned parents.